Coyote: Not So Ugly After All

Something is really resonating with me right now. That something, as embarrassed as I am to say, is the movie, "Coyote Ugly."



I am not a movie buff which is my disclaimer for not having ever seen this 10 year old, BEYOND cheesy, pop culture catastrophe after which hundreds of bars, truck stops, and even reality shows have patterned themselves. And just in case you are as out of the loop as I, the movie Coyote Ugly is about a small town girl named Violet who moves to the big city to pursue her career in singing and in song writing. Extremely cliche,' right? And even more cliche' is that Violet gets a job as a BAR TENDER to support herself as she chases her dream of breaking into the music industry. Never heard that one before, right? Riiiiiiiiight.



Folks, stay with me.



Violet's host of obstacles seems endless. Shopping her demo around to countless agencies and labels gets Violet, as a newbie, COUNTLESS rejections. Initially, she's conflicted about compromising her values to become a part of the sleaziness that is the bar tending style of the "coyotes." Violet finds herself opting to work at the bar instead of taking advantage of opportunities to display her talents at open mic nights, and when she does have chances to display her singing/song writing abilities, she finds herself succumbing to stage fright.



What exactly, you wonder, resonated with me so much that I felt compelled to blog about what some would argue is the worst movie released that year?



Well, Violet's story is every body's story no matter the profession, no matter the plight. We all can relate to beginning a new journey, seeking help from any and everyone, and being told, "no." And how many times has each of us stared down the forked road and thought, "do I compromise, or do I stand my ground?" For me, those crossroads have appeared more times than I can recollect. And what about the struggle of doing what you need versus doing what you love? How many of us are faced with this challenge regularly? It's the "I really wanna be doing what I love" versus the "I really gotta survive and sustain" conflict. And finally, there's the stage fright. We all - performers and non performers, alike - probably can attest to getting that one opportunity for which we've been praying and then letting that 1% of self-doubt get the best of the situation and ruining it. Yeah, you've been there, too.



For all the aforementioned reasons, watching Coyote Ugly - of ALL movies - inspired me. Ironically, a movie that, on the surface, is about a handful of scantily clad, seductress bar tenders is really about the human spirit's desire to accomplish and to achieve beyond one's wildest dreams.



Stage fright, though, is the most detrimental of the common denominators. It is the stage fright that stands between where we are today and where we are supposed to be.



Good thing Violet overcame her stage fright within the 2 hour time slot allotted for Coyote Ugly's showing! Oh yeah. SPOILER ALERT: Violet ends up getting discovered and LeAnn Rimes is the first major artist to sing one her original works.



So I totally learned to not judge a movie by it's mediocre trailer or by the no-named talent attached to the project because you just never know how inspired you might be by its true message.

The Giant that WAS

Sooooo…they tell me that there’s cheating in college sports?!?! I had NO idea!!

Now, unless you’ve been SO tuned into that wild, exciting World Cup Soccer coverage, then you probably didn’t miss this HUGE sports headline. The NCAA has found the University of Southern California GUILTY of numerous violations because they knowingly allowed players to accept gifts – some in the form of money, some in the form of HOUSES – like the one that was given to Reggie Bush’s parents – from professional sports agents, promoters, and other people who had vested interests in the post college, professional careers of the then student athletes. A mouthful for me…a mess for USC!!! Because of Bush’s ineligibility, the sanctions thrown down at USC include vacating their football victories from December 2004-December 2005, losing 30 scholarships for the next couple football seasons, and the UNTHINKABLE – they MIGHT even lose their 2005 BCS Championship Title. Or could THIS be the unthinkable– Reggie Bush’s 2006 Heisman might be yanked.

So this sucks. It sucks for the USC recruits who signed their lives away to become Trojan men. Players and recruits who now won’t even be able to play in a bowl game for two years…oh yeah, did I mention that their post season play privilege was revoked, too???

But ultimately, you gotta commend the NCAA for taking on the giant that WAS USC and making an example out of them. It seems that USC – coaches, athletic director, players, and fans were all subscribing to this Hollywood ideal. They were the actors; college football was the movie. But the actors thought they were bigger than the actual film. They weren’t, and the NCAA said, “it’s a wrap.” It’s difficult, I’m sure, to play by all the rules when the competitive climate begs of you to “win, win, win!” But if you’re gonna break some rules, at least be discreet versus openly socializing with your financial backers as did Bush on USC’s campus with his own, personal investors. Pete Carroll and crew got sloppy and arrogant…so much to the point that the NCAA could no longer turn a blind eye.

Everyone knows life isn’t fair and that sometimes you DO have to bend the rules. But everyone also knows that you NEVER let your RIGHT hand know what the LEFT is doing and USC, with all its PAC-10 and national football dominance and glory for the past 10 years, let the ENTIRE world know what it was doing without a care or concern about any possible consequence.

So …it DOES rain in Southern California or at least it does on USC until they can emerge from this muddy mess they’ve made.

Don't Let Yourself Be Mad...It's Trivial!

"Put positive energy into the things that matter most; don't give negative energy to the things about which you care the least."
-ERD

My above quote is an affirmation - a mantra - that I am having to repeat to myself a lot these days. Here's the story.

Everyone moves to LA to pursue a "dream." You already know mine - to become a host/talk show extraordinaire. In pursuing that dream, everyone serves, bar tends, or does some other something in the restaurant business. It's inevitable. These days, I'm serving and bar tending at, what usually is, the ideal place to work.

For those of you who have never worked in a restaurant, working in one is similar to attending high school. You have your cool kids, your awkward, quirky kids, the smart, organized kids, the teachers' pets, and so on and so forth. And just like in high school, everyone is competing against everyone else, but the stakes in restaurant world are higher because ultimately, everyone in this world, is competing for money. And as we learned in high school or in Sunday school or, hell, some where along the way, money is, what...the root of all evil. Exactly.

The bosses at my job, generally, are cool. So cool, in fact, that the "cool" kids get to dictate how things in our little parallel Universe are run. And you remember what happened in high school when some groups of students were suddenly granted the privilege to determine what other students could and could not do? Well, I don't particularly remember either, but it probably wasn't good. In our restaurant world, the "cool" kids getting this privilege is never good. It's not good because, with everyone competing to make the most money in the shortest amount of time, a co-worker having the ability to dictate how and where your money will be made while also possessing the power to give him or herself the best opportunity to make the most money (by virtue of being a "cool" kid) in a restaurant, is a recipe (pun intended) for disaster. To put it briefly, I walked into work tonight on what was supposed to be a huge money night to find that one of the "cool" kids decided, "Hmmm...I'll give myself the best section in the entire restaurant. And to do this, I will take away Erica's section and give her what I was supposed to have because I don't want to wait on that shitty area, so Erica can have it." Hmph.

I was livid. Livid. LIVID. Then I took a step back and repeated my little mantra to myself: Put positive energy into the things that matter most; don't put negative energy into the things about which you care the least. Because I'm only human, it took a minute (or two or three) for me to internalize this and let go of the situation AS it was happening to me, but by letting it go, my night went smoothly, and I was blessed to, as we servers and bartenders like to say, make bank.

Making money - especially while living and pursuing entertainment in LA - is muy importante. So I'm not implying that I don't care about work. But at the end of the day, when I "clock out" and go home, I'm NOT here in LA to be a lifelong service industry employee. I'm here pursuing bigger-than-life dreams and goals. My mornings are filled with auditions, callbacks, and countless hours behind my laptop emailing my headshots, resumes' and reels to people for whom I want to work. My afternoons are filled with acting and hosting classes and 2 hour workouts so that I can maintain my "Hollywood" image. Yeah, my evenings may be spent serving and bar tending, but my late nights are spent praying and asking God for clarity to make the right decisions as I live this unpredictable life. To put it simply, having a not-so-good section at work, in the long run, is definitely something about which I could care less. Gotta put my positive energy where my heart is, and my heart is NOT into fighting with a "cool" kid for a good section of tables in a restaurant.

And besides, EVERYONE knows that the "cool" kids in high school actually were pretty "uncool" in the real world.

"Always Wear Heels"

Besides my mom, sister, God, and of course, Oprah, there aren't really many people whose words stick with me for long periods of time. I better rephrase that. While I DO quite frequently come across quotes or inspirational pieces that I love and that have lasting, positive effects on me, it is rarely that I remember who said them, who wrote them, or know the source from which they derived. Soooo when I read Kimora Lee Simmons's book, "Fabulosity," I was very pleased to internalize 2 very important lessons that she teaches in the book. One of those lessons (and I paraphrase) is to always, as woman (and maybe, even, as a man), have an over-sized, bright colored bag, and the other is to "always wear heels." The latter lesson, for some reason, really stuck with me and became the name of my blog.

I live in Los Angeles, a city where sexy meets silicon, fashion is infused with fun, and dreams are turned into realities - though "reality," in LA, CA is a totally subjective concept. It's a fairy dust-filled city lined with perfect beaches, to-die-for weather, and an indescribable energy unique only to this town. Living in what, on the surface, seems to be fantasy land, OF COURSE you always wanna be wearing your heels! Gotta uphold the image, right? Gotta live the dream.

I moved to tinsletown to accomplish my lifelong goal of getting paid to be in front of the camera. With an extensive background and training in all facets of the arts, I was unsure for a long time of how I wanted to focus my creative energy to achieve this goal. When I finally discovered my niche, it was as if God had held my hand in his and had gently blown a loving wind through my head clearing the clouds of uncertainty. I was here to HOST. Red carpets, sports shows, television shows, round table discussions, etc. It was - it IS - my calling. To facilitate discussion. To inform while entertaining. To encourage people to examine the many dimensions and layers of other people and of life. And just as with acting and modeling, we hosts have to endure the grueling audition process of trying to get "discovered." Of course I'm gonna "always wear heels" because I want to be sexy at each of these auditions!

But my "always wear heels" motto is not about keeping up with Beverly Hills Barbie or just about physical appearance. Certainly, it helps to look good on the outside, but my "always wear heels" doctrine is about internalizing that attitude and sense of empowerment you have when you're towering over the masses in your heels. It's about making sure the light that emanates from within is shining so brightly that, no matter what you're wearing, you always feel fly. It's about carrying yourself in such a way that, even when you have on your $1 Old Navy flip flops, you feel as if you have on your $70 Steve Maddens or your $700 Jimmy Choos (had to throw the Steve Madden reference in there because I definitely don't have Jimmy Choo cash yet)!

I'm no self- help guru...again, I'm just an entertainment host who likes to see her thoughts in black and white! But I do like to share the little things that help me get through life with those around me. Soooo as you follow my blog, I do hope that my experiences - exciting and boring, trivial and serious - are experiences to which you can relate!

And, oh yeah, if you ever have a sighting of me NOT wearing heels...don't fret, I'm always wearing heels in my mind!